a note to self
when you grow up, you start to care a lot more about things you've never thought about, and you start to care a lot less about things you used to always think about. you don't notice that you're not the same person until you look back and realize that you don't remember why something/someone ever mattered.
when you grow up, you never have enough time for anything. if you try to make enough time for something, you end up taking away from something else.. then the whole cycle spirals out of control. there isn't ever time to really "rest", and even if the time available is more than enough time, it'll just never feel sufficient.
when you grow up, you can't not think about consequences. you can't do something without subconsciously weighing in your mind whether or not the actions (or lack of..) are worth the repercussions your sense of logic makes the fun less fun, and the no fun even more miserable.
when you grow up, seeing is not believing. by now, seeing means thinking, rethinking, doubting, then stressing. there really is more than meets the eye. just don't become a prisoner in your mind; dangerous thoughts are JUST thoughts, and as deadly as they are, they won't get to you unless you let them.
when you grow up, life becomes a never ending cycle of falling and picking yourself up. chances are, the things that you struggle with, you've struggled with before. new news is old news, and old news are just reminders of yesterday's mistakes. if you've learned from your mistakes, you don't forget about them. forgive yourself for making mistakes but remember the lessons they taught you.
when you grow up, you realize how temporary "permanent" is. there is nothing permanent about life and the physical world/people around us. everything is constantly changing, and if you don't keep up, you'll be left behind. if you don't choose to pull out the weeds and start planting stronger roots, you'll end up with a lifeless patch instead of a garden. that's not what I want.
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